Moonless midnight of my mind.

Don’t just dip your toes

Into the moonless midnight

Of my mind

Plunge headfirst

With abandon

Make your home

Among the dark waters

Swim, until you find

All the secret caves.

Don’t be afraid, darling

For I know

You are no stranger

To the darkness.

Colour me happy with

All the shades

Of your name

And the day the sun

Finally begins to shine

Down on my waters

Will be marked in history

As the day two souls danced

To the whispers

Of a heart

That is broken no more.

---

-The Girl Lost In The Bookstore

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Sunday, every day Sunday.

The odour

Of your departure

Lingers in the air

Your broken promises

Float in front

Of my eyes-

I reach out

And curl my fist

Around a few of them

And desperately shove it

Inside my mouth

But they dissolve

To nothingness

On my tongue

And I’m left

With the taste

Of your sweet lies.

*

Strength comes knocking

Once in a while

But the heartbreak

That always seems to

Linger just behind

The door,

Pushes it away-

I can hear the thud

As my strength

Hits the front porch

Muttering curses

Under its breath

For ever having tried.

*

I spend my days

Drinking loneliness

Like whiskey,

Singing haunted songs

To the sky,

Eating poetry for lunch-

For me, now,

Sunday mornings

Will always smell

Like your absence.

---

-The Girl Lost In The Bookstore

This poem was selected and published by The Anonymous Writer on their website. You can read it by clicking here.

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Heavy emptiness.

It’s been 1 year, 2 months, and 21 days. And I can still feel your absence everywhere. In the tiny spaces left behind by the window in the living room that won’t close completely, in the cracks in my palm, down to the very gaps …

Love letters to the dead.

At times Your absence Whooshes into me Like a gust of wind Through an open door And I see you Everywhere I go. As for me, I am Too much feeling Trapped in Too little body Trying to Leak out the pain By writing Love …

Emotions, emotions.

To all my friends, who would drop everything and come running if I was sad. You know who you are.

Hello, my dear dear friends.

This letter is not going to be sappy and emotional. Okay, it totally is going to be. I’ll try to tone down the sappiness though, we all know I’m not good at that. *chuckles*

I’ve been feeling emotional for some reason, and I was going around telling everyone how much I love them, which, lets face it, I never do. So, I thought, why not make it into a post for the whole world to know? Let them know how lucky I am?

I have no idea how to even begin putting into words how you guys make me feel. You have been there for me when I needed it the most, through all the important and the not-so-important things. You listen to me babble about random stuff, and sit there with that smile playing on your lips. That’s not even the best part. The best part is that you actually care about all those random things I have to say. And, about my crazy theories. *chuckles*

And, when I’m feeling paranoid about something and start overreacting as usual *insert eye roll*, you let me call you up and listen patiently while I list out the reasons why I think I’m justified in being paranoid, and you never once try to offer advice or interrupt me, because you know all I want is for you to listen. I can think out loud in front of you.

You never once tell me I’m being silly, or that I’m overreacting. Wait a minute, you do. Haha! What’s more, you never judge me, and you always understand. I can’t even begin to thank you guys for that. Talking to you guys always, ALWAYS makes me feel better. I can be super weird with you, and not have you running away. Most importantly, I can be completely MYSELF with you.

You guys are all the therapy I need. All those times when you guys make me laugh so hard my stomach hurts. And all those pep-talks you give me whenever I need it. You are the ONLY ones who can tell me bluntly that I need to cut the crap, and get away with it. Sometimes, the truth hurts, and you never fail to tell me that, even when others would comfort me with lies. And, I love you for it.

God, I love you guys. So freaking much. Even though I don’t say it much, I hope you know that I do. Also, I can’t imagine life without you. It would be dark and gloomy. To be quite honest, it wouldn’t be much of a life. You colour my world, in the most beautiful way possible. You guys are my family.

If this post has been dedicated to you, know that you are loved. Unconditionally. And, you better comment on this post. Each one of you. *stares you down* (No sappy stuff, please. I would prefer it if you stick to those affectionately rude comments.) Or I will kick your ass. I mean it. *stern expression* I can see you rolling your eyes and saying, “no you won’t”. *sigh*

---

-The Girl Lost In The Bookstore

P.S. This post is for my real life friends. I will dedicate one for you all lovely readers later. 🙂

When I see you…

And, when I see you, maybe five years from now, I would show you my engagement ring, and tell you that I met a great guy who treats me really well. I would tell you, that he makes me laugh. He doesn’t treat me like I’m fragile, because he knows I’m not. He doesn’t try to save me, he knows that I would destroy anything and anyone that dare ever mess with me. He knows I’m a dragon who spews fire from her mouth, and he loves me anyway. He loves me for my sharp mind, and my even sharper mouth. He makes me go absolutely crazy. There’s not a dull moment in my life with him. He loves arguing with me, for he knows how much I love it. He never lets me win, he always argues with all he’s got, which is just the way I like it. Whenever he introduces me to someone, the first thing he says is, “this chick is crazy and I love her.” Then, he looks at me like I’m the sun to his sky.

I would tell you, that his smile is like my very favourite love song. When it’s 2AM, and I can’t sleep because I’m still hungover on that book I just read, he comes and sits with me in the living room, then falls asleep on the couch because he was too sleepy to stay awake any longer. I would be cooking in the kitchen, and he would pull me to him, and start dancing like a crazy person. When we go for long drives in the evening, he pulls off just to kiss me. He looks at me like I put all the stars in the sky when he thinks I’m not looking. He sits there and listens to me cry over fictional characters like it’s something sane people do every day. He tells me I’m crazy, but that he loves me for it. He loves me, like you never did.

-The Girl Lost In The Bookstore

A letter to you.

Hi. I’ve been wanting to say a couple of things to you for a long time, but whenever I had the chance to say them out loud, I somehow couldn’t form the words. So I decided to do what I do best, write them instead.

This is not a letter about how much I love you, or how much you mean to me. Because you know all of that already. And, I know that you love me too. And I also know how much. I’m the first-and sometimes, only- person you tell stuff to. I’m the person you call bursting with news because you couldn’t wait another minute to tell me. I’m the person that saves you from yourself, the one that is always there for you. I’m the one that keeps all of your broken pieces glued together.

And you’re all those things for me, too. You’re there for me. You’re there for all the important things. And, I wish that were enough. But, it’s not. I want need you to be there for the unimportant things, too. The little things that do not matter, I need you for those, too.

I hate the fact that you take me for granted. Hate the fact that you think I won’t go anywhere. And, I hate myself more because it’s true. I hate that your problems always overshadow mine. For once in your life, I want you to stop talking about your life, and really pay attention to what’s happening in mine. Even if it’s not interesting, even if you’re bored out of your mind, I want you to just.. Listen. And, I hate that I keep hoping for this to happen, even though I more than likely know that it won’t. I want you to be the kind of friend that I am to you.

I know you’re probably never going to read this. I guess it’s one of the main reasons I had the courage to write this. And, truth be told, I don’t want you to read this. Because I’m scared of what might happen if you do. About what comes after that. Because, no matter what, I don’t think I want there to be an end.

–Still all the love in the world, R