Heavy emptiness.

It’s been 1 year, 2 months, and 21 days. And I can still feel your absence everywhere. In the tiny spaces left behind by the window in the living room that won’t close completely, in the cracks in my palm, down to the very gaps between my front teeth.

Some days, the pain comes wafting in with the aroma of Minnie auntie’s famous fish fry. And it is all I can do not to break down and cry.

There are days when I forget that you’re gone. I barge into your room, excited to tell you about the hilarious commercial I just saw, and feel your absence hitting me square in the chest. It wraps its icy fingers around my soul, and I have to physically stop the scream lingering in my throat from escaping my mouth. I wonder how emptiness can be so heavy.

They say you can only feel pain. But I see it, maa. Every day, in the blue of my eyes, when I look into the mirror.



-The Girl Lost In The Bookstore

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91 thoughts on “Heavy emptiness.

  1. This is sensationally poignant and has so much depth. Your “something new” is amazing, especially here:

    “in the cracks in my palm, down to the very gaps between my front teeth.

    Some days, the pain comes wafting in with the aroma of Minnie auntie’s famous fish fry. And it is all I can do not to break down and cry.”

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I stayed away from commenting because this felt too personal and pure to touch and knowing that the character is fictional hasn’t taken anything away from it. Only deepened my respect for your skill.
    I bow to the final line.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. You are welcome πŸ™‚
        The emptiness is actually very disastrous !! It takes time not to break but to accept reality.. ..

        I miss Maa since last two years !! Thank you for sharing, it means a lot tho me:)

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Omg!! Maths..
        You are truly a genius..
        I used to be scared of maths while of my life until UPSC has made it qualifying!!
        It’s great to have a friend from maths .. πŸ™‚

        Liked by 1 person

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